Alibi or Not

I just gotta let it out As the voices scream and shout My lungs inhale the sighs Of nothing but these lies Or so they tell me so

My brain is erratic And now I'm getting ecstatic 'Cause depression's exotic Coming down, so chaotic I just can't take this overload

Don't tell me to change It's all the way out of my range Jumping to reach and try But my wings are to broken to fly I fall to the floor And you decide to give me more So I'll take the pain Said it'd help me gain Instead I loose what I haven't got

Life is terrifying But you'll point your fingers and say I'm lying My heads about to blow As blood from my new wound starts to flow I look at my red stained hand In my life I've lost all command And now I've got nowhere to hide Because it's all full inside I pull my hair In this despair As I start to scream: "I JUST DONT CARE!"

And now all is silent My hands are clean but it was so violent Though breath I breathe I'm not living But they have the guts to say I'm wrong

So I don't know my life This pitiful thing filled with strife I don't know me Or what's to be Or what to apologize for

Oh, so you think you're perfect And I'm just going through a small little defect You say everything's gonna be alright Then why am I haunted every single night And then comes the day Where I beg for it to just all go away This pain must be fake Or at least for my sake Which means I must not be sane?

And now with this question I truly wonder who should get the suggestion Is it me who will get crushed Or you who thrills to see this rush? Madness is my alibi For it's the only one who'll comply I'll believe in this sickness If I can achieve forgiveness Hopefully I will be free As I allow you to start dissecting Laying down I give a call: "PLEASE STOP THE SOUNDS OF THE SCREAMS!"